Humor: friend or foe? When it comes to leadership, it turns out to be both. When used well, humor is a leader’s friend: it builds rapport, fosters a positive culture, and even enhances performance (Mesmer-Magnus, Glew, & Viswesvaran, 2012). Used poorly, though, and it quickly turns foe: it can alienate teams and erode trust.
But here’s the good news: you don’t need to be a stand-up comedian to use humor effectively in leadership. The right kind of humor can enhance your communication and leadership impact, making you more relatable and influential. As Aaker and Bagdonas (2021) put it, humor allows your personality to shine through. Let’s explore how leaders can strategically use humor to their advantage, backed by research, common sense, and a few chuckles along the way.
Timing and Awareness Are Everything
There’s a time and place for humor, and let’s be honest—some moments are not it. Imagine cracking a joke during a crisis or making light of an intense performance review—cue the awkward silence. Leaders must develop a sense of when and how to use humor effectively. Research emphasizes that humor, when well-timed, can help defuse tension and aid teams in bouncing back from setbacks (Hu, Parke, Peterson, & Simon, 2024).
Tip: Humor works best when it acknowledges a shared experience. If a project has gone sideways but the team is already rallying, a line like, “Well, this could’ve gone smoother—good thing we’re pros at Plan B!” can lighten the mood without undermining accountability. However, if the situation is still too raw or involves outside stakeholders, humor may be ill-timed. The best leaders know when a situation calls for gravity and when it calls for levity.
Authenticity: The Secret Sauce
Forced humor is like a handshake that lasts too long—awkward for everyone involved. Research shows that humor strengthens leader-follower relationships when it’s authentic (Hu et al., 2024). The key is to use humor that aligns with your natural sense of humor.
Tip: Laugh at the stumbles. Self-deprecating humor, when used wisely, can humanize a leader. As Aaker and Bagdonas (2021) note, sharing personal anecdotes or minor blunders builds connection. But there’s a caveat: don’t undermine your credibility. Keep the humor light and relatable—like joking about tripping on the way into a meeting and claiming it’s proof you don’t get out much. Avoid making jokes that cast doubt on your ability to do your job. And remember—less is more. A well-placed, occasional quip is far more effective than a constant stream of self-mockery.
Practical Exercise 1: Try keeping a humor journal. Take note of what types of humor land well and which ones fall flat. Observe how humor is used effectively (or not) in your workplace. And don’t be scared to practice in low-stakes settings.
Practical Exercise 2: Start your next team meeting by sharing an “oops moment” from your week. Did you forget you weren’t muted and yell for your partner to get your package at the door (yes, even after 4 years of hybrid work), or did you bike into the office, only to realize your laptop is missing from your bag? This normalizes imperfection and invites others to bring their whole selves to work, too.
Storytelling: The Ultimate Delivery Mechanism
Humor isn’t just about cracking jokes—it’s about how you deliver your message. Research highlights how improv techniques, such as quick thinking and storytelling, enhance social competence (Felsman, Seifert, & Himle, 2018). Leaders can apply similar principles to improve communication.
Tip: Structure your humor like a story—with a beginning, middle, and a punchline at the end. Pause before delivering the punchline to let anticipation build. Think of it as saying, “Thank you all for coming to this meeting—pause—not that you had a choice.” A simple, well-placed pause creates space for your team to connect the dots themselves, making the humor land more naturally.
Training Takeaway: Consider incorporating improv exercises into leadership development programs. Classic games like “Yes, And” foster collaboration, creative storytelling, and quick thinking. These skills help leaders adapt on the fly, build confidence, and approach challenges with greater flexibility and innovation.
Don’t Forget to Keep It Respectful
As a leader, it’s essential to recognize that humor can cross a line – not all jokes are funny, and not everyone has the same sense of humor. Alongside situational awareness, leaders who are adept at using humor as their friend are skilled at adjusting their style to the individual they’re with. Furthermore, jokes that “punch down” are never funny and can easily alienate your team, creating a toxic environment (Mesmer-Magnus et al., 2012). Humor should bring people together, not make anyone feel less than.
Humor in Leadership: A Final Thought
Leaders, take your work seriously—but don’t take yourself too seriously. Humor, when used intentionally and authentically, fosters stronger relationships, lightens the workplace, and enhances leadership impact. As one wise philosopher (or possibly a meme) once said, “If you can’t laugh at yourself, someone else will.” So why not set the tone by leading with a laugh?
