Great leadership begins by mastering the practice of active listening. One of the surest ways to lead teams or an organization is by listening to your employees. Not only will you get good ideas and input but you will create a lasting environment of respect. Employees who feel respected will perform at their best. Everyone wants to feel valued, and listening is the best way to demonstrate your commitment to your employees.
Listening is all about respect and value. If you value the person speaking to you, then listening is easy. It’s not about valuing the content as much as it’s about valuing the person. If you don’t have respect for someone, then why would you want to listen to them? We listen to make sure the other person feels as if he or she is being understood. We also listen to what we are interested in and to what we find to be valuable information.
For leaders, the first step in being a good listener starts with clear intention. You must have the intention to be a good listener. You also have to want to grow in your capacity to listen. Active listening is a skill that is honed and improved over time. You have to want to become better at listening, otherwise there is no point.
Then you need to respect each and every employee who works with you, regardless of his or her rank in your organization. Once again, it’s not only about respecting their ideas, it’s about respecting them. If respect is not at the foundation of listening, then it is merely adopting techniques and behaviors—outward signs that you are pretending to listen. If you adopt a posture of listening that isn’t authentic, the person talking can tell the difference and will not feel heard or respected.
A truly good listener makes the person speaking feel listened to and heard. Anyone who has spoken with former President Bill Clinton has remarked at how he makes them feel like the most important person in the room. It is amazing the impact that being heard can have on someone. And conversely, it is amazing the impact of not feeling heard can have. Here are a few simple guidelines I recommend to develop your capacity to listen:
- Curiosity. One way to become a good listener is by being curious. Wanting to find out what a person has to say is powerful.
- Cues. Another way is to make sure the person speaking feels heard by demonstrating visual cues that show you are actively listening. A simple nod of the head or a “go on” and good eye contact will go a long way.
- Eliminate distractions. You also want to get rid of any distractions. That means turning off the computer, the cell phone, closing the door, holding all calls, and making sure there are no interruptions. Whatever distracts you must be dealt with before having a conversation. No multitasking allowed.
- Take notes. One thing that helps to stay focused and to listen is taking notes. This will make the other person feel like what he or she is saying is important enough for you to make a record of the conversation. The person will feel as though you have taken him or her seriously.
- Ask questions. You also should ask clarifying questions. This shows you are paying attention and closely following the conversation.
- Simple gratitude. Finally, thanking the person for the information he or she has shared is key. The person has taken the time to share important news or information with you, and you should respect the quality of his or her work and initiative.
Great leaders are effective communicators because they are great listeners. All effective communication begins with wanting to be a good listener and valuing the person who is doing the talking. Your employees will believe you are a powerful communicator because you’ve taken the time to listen to them.
Terry Ward is the founder and president of a national communication and presentation skills training organization, the CommSkills Group. He has more than 30 years of experience in communication skills training, and many of his programs were founded on the guiding principle: The way you communicate an idea is as important as the idea itself! His method of coaching leverages the power of the spoken word by getting professionals to access who they are from the inside out so they can use their own natural style, abilities, and unique attributes to deliver powerful messages that persuade, motivate, and inspire. As a change agent and catalyst, Ward’s focus is on changing the way people and businesses communicate. His proprietary method, “State of Mind,” guides professionals to develop communications skills that make powerful human connections with their audience. A partial list of clients includes Disney, Mattel, Sony Pictures, DreamWorks, Activision, Univision, FOX Sports, and ESPN. For more information, visit http://www.commskillsgroup.com, or follow Terry Ward on Twitter @The_TerryWard.
