When you have a new manager after years with a former manager, your expectation may be that the new manager will have an establishing conversation with you.
That conversation might go something like: “Judy, I want to talk to you about my management style and get a sense for how you work. Bert was your boss for the last 10 years, and even though we know each other, you have never been managed by me and I have never had you as an employee. I wanted to share with you my expectations for your role and I wanted to make sure I understand what your expectations are for me. I also want to make sure we understand the delineation of our responsibilities—what’s in my court and what’s in yours. I don’t want there to be confusion or a feeling of anyone’s toes being stepped on.”
At least that’s the conversation I would have if I were coming in as the new boss of a person who had been managed by someone much different from me for the last decade. You would be surprised—or not so surprised—to know that this conversation, which seems so logical, often does not take place when management changes hands.
Training on the Expectations Conversation
Since not everyone who is promoted to higher-level management has great communication skills, or because they may have an agenda that keeps them from using those skills, employees must be trained to “communicate up” when necessary.
The expression, “communicating up,” can mean something a little different from how I am using it, from what I read online. This piece by Steve Moloney on LinkedIn, for example, is about conveying your ideas and value upward in your organization. The way I am using it is less lofty. I’m talking about employees understanding how to initiate and lead an establishing conversation with a new manager about expectations or start a conversation with a long-time manager who has created a new protocol or initiative that they have not done a good job of explaining.
A Communication Module to Get on the Same Page
A one-time communication module—for both existing employees and all new employees as part of the onboarding process—could cover when such a conversation is necessary, and role-play how to handle it.
In an ideal world, the training given to managers would make it unnecessary for employees to know how to initiate these conversations, but from my own experience, I know managers often fall short in this area, either intentionally or unintentionally.
“Tom, as my new boss, I want to understand your expectations for me, which may be different from what I have experienced with my last boss. I also want to explain how I have been doing things and see if there are changes you want to make to those routines and habits. Last, I want to make sure I understand your responsibilities versus mine. I don’t want to overstep or be surprised when you take the lead on something I thought was my role.”
Training to Deal with Uncooperative Communicators
Not every boss will be open to having this conversation in a genuine way. They may only converse about expectations and division of labor in vague terms. That could be due to poor verbal skills or it could be due to something darker—a boss who wants to keep expectations and division of labor vague, so the employee has a greater chance of failing and being pushed out. I hate to say it, but I have experienced this, too.
Training to communicate up would teach employees how to handle the boss who only answers obliquely and in generalities.
An employee in this situation could be taught to say something like: “I don’t think I understand what you’re saying. Could you provide a few specific examples of things I do now that you would like me to do differently? And a few specific things I do now that you would like me to continue doing? I also think it would be helpful if we could create a list of tasks that fall under your umbrella of responsibilities and tasks that fall under mine.”
Just as managers are trained to keep dated records of conversations, employees having conversations such as the above should be trained to do the same. They also should understand that Human Resources and Learning professionals are available to help if they can’t figure out what their new boss wants from them. They should know exactly who to contact for help in having these conversations. That shouldn’t be necessary, but, sadly, sometimes is.
You never want an employee to be blindsided by uncommunicated expectations and critiques. Sometimes that requires employees who have been trained to take the communications lead with their bosses.
Do you train employees to push managers who communicate poorly for the information they need to succeed at their jobs? If so, how do you do that?